Should I help my mum?

My mum has been drinking for almost 10 years. On and off, and I always helped her. With support, talks, sending her to doctors, talking to her.

I moved from the house then I was 20, and I left my brother 14 alone with her. She kept on drinking. She could be fine for a month and then she would drink vodka for 5 days, she  would drink and sleep. She doesn’t function. She would drink sleeping pills and antidepressants. She would fell and be super skinny as she would eat. My brother would spend days alone in his room. I felt sorry for him, but I am living abroad I couldn’t help. I would take him on summers or during school holidays.  

We always were for her. Emotionally, supported her with money. She lives with her partner now – but he drinks as well, so then my mum drinks to death he doesn’t do much.

Last year she lost her job, I went home and managed to talk her in (it took about a week) to go to rehabilitation. The doctor said that she needs to stay for at least three months. She left after 3 weeks, because she said she is not like them. She is not an alcoholic. She refuses to go to AA meetings, she refuses to go to hospital . She didn’t drink for 5 months and then started again.

She is angry and manipulative, she doesn’t love us, I know she does, but she wouldn’t apologise. She doesn’t have job, so she doesn’t have money. She asks money form as t pay for bills, o her partner. She drinks again. She blamed her mother that she cursed her – that’s why she drinks. She blames me and my brother now. She always said that she had us to support her then she is going to be old. But we refuse to give her money now.

She is only 50, she is very pretty. She is depressed and angry, she would not want to help her self.

I don’t know that to do – as I am so scared to see her homeless, and begging for money or sleeping on the street. And I am scared to see her dead.

Should I again try to talk her into hospital? Or pay for her mortgage?

 

Tags: 
Forums: