and i'm only 15 and i cant take life anymore.

mum been drinking since she had me but everything kicked of more she started drinking badly two years ago, everyday from 6 o'clock in till she pass outs or she just don't have anymore left, she don't sound bad sometime but lately its out of control!. over this 2 years everything gone upside down!, i lost my dad on the 2nd april but i cant remember what he looks like last time i saw him was when i was born then he got in touch with me mum didn't want to she hated him one day he was gonna come and see me cause i told him about mum and what she been doing with the drinking and not take any care what i have been up to then he was on he's way and he died on the phone to me in a crash, never seem to get that out my head. i've changed schools because my old school wasn't helping me learn and things kicked off and i wasn't aloud near someone and everything and so on, back to mum, she never seems to care she made the whole family hate us well part from my nan and grandad and even then they have moved 5hours away from me so i have no one, apart from mum but she don't seem like family. i've tried everything from trying to kill myself by culling my arms, overdoes and close of using a rope, but then school saw my arms, they became worried over me so they took me the child protection teacher, and they got me help, they try to have social services and about 4 months later after me having meetings and making sure im getting fed and everything i got the social service letter back but my mum didn't want nothing to do with it she disagreed with it all, she says she never goes over drink she never does this or that and its all down on me, so they can do nothing to help. then the school started worrying even more they hear off my councilor that the arguments have gone mad and i cant take it anymore, when she in a bad mood i got and sit upstairs and put my bed in front of the door so she cant get in to start on me, she tried once or twice but she never wins, so my school choose to help me instead with everything they put on a phone to a woman she was nice and she was telling me she was gonna send me some things to help me with my mum and everything else that happened, then she told me about this and ive read some of the problems and i never knew how many people have the same problem as me. its made me feel less alone and scared, im a 15 year old girl and i don't know what else i can do! help before something happens?..

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